Some meme for youyou

Blogging at work while on break... One of the GREAT JOYS of the corporate lifestyle... Wish I could be doing this full time but I digress.

So Paul's continuing journey into the land of the unemployed has taken a 4 month toll.
Last year at about this time, he was entering the hospital in status epilepticus, AKA exiting real life for Twitchville. He had 4 Clonic Tonic (AKA Gran Mal) seizures in as many nights.
We took him to the neurologist, who almost did nothing. Paul couldn't talk, couldn't count backwards from 100 by 3's, (a task which is usually easy for him) We found he was having all kinds of different seizures. They changed the drugs he was on, and poof, after a month or two he was ok to work again and then we started to understand the kind of stresses he had REALLY been under at work. He wasn't able to fully verbalize before. Now, a year later and he's been fired by the same jerk who started the trouble. I should send that man an anvil top hat.

I'm sure it'll end up being a win-win situation. Our Hollywood Disney ending hasn't happened yet. We said "I will" several years ago and we are still just trying to take off.

Most people have dreams. Most people have goals they are working toward: They are working toward their degree, their freedom, losing weight I have found that I am stunningly goal-less. I also feel like I'm lacking a spine. I want to publish books but at the same time the security of my current situation is culling me to complacency. That and utter exhaustion. I am on the brink, all I feel like doing is sitting down and sleeping. I don't normally watch TV or movies, and yet my Netflix account is seeing record use from me.
I stopped writing because although I loved reading it and thought it was funny, it felt like a 24/7 bitch session. And people inevitably ended up feeling like my husband was a complete lazy ass loser.
He's not, FYI. I got sick of defending him though. I spent the last 2 years of my life doing that in the court of law. Just sometimes, the lackluster low activity level and lack of stressing about anything gets to me. but it's not actually a bad thing that he doesn't stress out.

The baby learned an evil laugh a few days ago. Lily's been over and so we trade off our nightly television/movie sessions between Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog The Crow and various Disney Sap

Anyway, Dr. Horrible got Paul breaking into fits of maniacal laughter, and in turn, since Tom is in full "Monkey see, Monkey do" mode, we now have a baby with an evil laugh. Which kind of sounds like, "Wahahahahah... (eruption of baby giggles)"

The power went out Sunday evening/early Monday Morning. Everyone in the house made sure to tell me all about it. The kids upstairs, who are very young, screamed. Which woke the pre-teen in my apartment up who asked me, "Mom, what the heck is wrong with the MP3 player and speakers?" (I explained the power was out, which I really would have thought to be self explanatory, she has a fan in her room, too.) The sassing from the hallway woke Evan up, who yelled "Mom, my TV is off." I responded the power was out, he turned over and went back to sleep. An hour later Dan woke up and insisted he HAD to sleep with Paul and I... Add in the dog, with every person who passed within a mile of my window, (here's a hint: US 23 runs about a half a mile away from my window, and can be heard clearly on nights when there is no electricity running.) and you have a three ring circus, BEFORE needing to grocery shop and go to work.
I'll admit, with all of my running around I ended up staying home from work,. It was a risk/reward behavior. If I went in, I was more likely to get myself fired for sassing off at one of the customers. I'm usually pretty easygoing about things now, but yeah, days like that, forget it.

Well something that started as a quick project on break has turned into an epic battle to stay awake after work.
If you haven't done so already, please make sure you see My friend's kickstarter website Andy's CDs

Garon has been a dear friend of mine since the 12th grade. While my parents were going through the divorce, me being alienated from a lot of my friends due to a bad break up and then the start of a relationship between my then best friend and my ex boyfriend. Garon was one of the few VERY close very dear friends that I confided in, and he always made me feel better. He would always tell me "I am going to show all of these people they are wrong about me. I am going to go to LA and I am going to write scripts. I'm going to make it." Anytime he and I talk it's like we pick up where we left off, even though we haven't seen each other in years. One of the things I always told him is that I had faith that he would make it to LA some day, except when it started to look like he was giving up, then I told him "no, I don't think you'll make it." And he said "I'll show you" and had all of his stuff in a moving van a month later. (Somewhat true story! I don't know if it was I who had convinced him to get off his arse and go, but I know he split soon afterward.) He swore he'd never forgive me for losing faith in him. But then we talked. And argued like a feral cat and dog. I don't know if he forgave me or not, but I know it's no longer a big deal. He made it to LA 12 years ago, and he's a much happier person for it.

When he lived here, I would come pick him up every night around 9ish, we'd go to a movie, then around midnight we'd go play tag at an abandon playground, sometimes with friends, sometime alone. I had a crush on him then, but now I think of him like the younger brother I never had. We aren't close anymore, not really. But I promised him that I'd always be there and I'd NEVER give up faith in him again. To this day, I haven't. I won't, either. Garon has proved to me that anything he sets his pen, heart and mind to, will happen.
Garon is one of those people that I look to and I think, "God, what have I done with these last 12 years?" I had some kids, he went out to LA and maybe he didn't make it BIG ,but he's trying.
He's got other cheerleaders now. He's got other close friends who take care of him, but I'm back here in the shadows doing everything I can to make sure he succeeds. Maybe you know him, maybe you don't know him. But he's a very important person in my life, and he deserves your praise and money.
Even a dollar helps. And I'm broke now.

I'm going to take my goalless deflated self to bed now before I become a blabbering fool at the keyboard. Oh, too late.